Saturday, August 24, 2013

Healing Myself

I took a huge step in healing my relationship with my mother today.  I told her that the reason our relationship has always been strained is that I believed everything my dad said about her not really loving me or being able to handle me.  I felt abandoned as a lost cause because she said I was just like my dad, unfeeling and uncaring.  Actually, I didn't trust my mother really loved me.  I knew she cared, but have always felt like she loves Shanna and Maegan more.  She started crying and said she loves me very much and I am her firstborn.  I wasn't trying to make her cry.  I wanted her to see that my eyes are open now.

I also talked with Scott today about the problem he has.  He started rubbing my leg and I asked him to stop.  I told him I am no longer going to allow him to manipulate me.  I need to get away from him.  I told him everything I saw in him from lack of empathy to needs for constant attention.  I didn't call it NPD, but I described to him very accurately what he was doing that fits the description.  I told him I'm not trying to being him down, but trying to help him.  He did say a few things to flip it around as me being in the wrong, but he also listened.  Maybe it is the fact that I told him I am leaving him soon that got his attention.  I don't know that he will make any real effort to change or if he even can.   I seriously doubt he will admit to this being a serious flaw he needs to correct.

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